5 Reasons Why We Didn't Throw A Big Birthday Party for Bela

Our little girl is one. Turned one last month. No big parties, just us family, celebrating her and this big milestone.

I came to terms with my decision not to throw a big birthday party for Bela. It is totally okay mamas. It does not mean she is loved a little less, definitely not. It only means that this mama has a change in her life perspectives. It doesn't mean my decision before to throw big parties for Lanna and Prince is not valid, they are.  At that time, for us, it was the best thing to do. Bela and Prince have a 12-year gap. I was different back in my 30s and in my 20s. 

I had Lanna in my 20s, Prince in my 30s, and Bela now that I am 40.

5 Reasons why we opted not to throw a big birthday party for Bela

1. Babies get overwhelmed by big crowds, loud noises, and new faces, especially at this age. 

Bela is no different so why do that to her. During Lanna and Prince, I was young and I liked big crowds and parties. It was I who wanted the party, not my baby. Probably, I was not well aware of how my baby would feel and I simply followed what I knew. That first birthday must be celebrated with a big party. As I get more mature and maybe well-informed about my baby's reaction to these parties, I choose to have a smaller group, a few closest friends, familiar faces, and just the immediate family to be around.

2. Babies start having long-term memories from eighteen months. 

She will not remember her first birthday at all. She will only know it through the stories we tell her and from pictures and videos we keep. A blog post I've written about it such as this one. We had a do-it-yourself first birthday photoshoot at Al Majaz Park on a nice sunny morning complete with cake and gifts, a nice outfit for Bela (Dress and Ribbon from here), and an I-am-one banner (from here), to remember it by.

3. There are many other ways to celebrate. 

We had some nice red velvet cupcakes in camp with our off-roaders family and we stayed in a nice hotel in Dubai on her first birthday. The best part of it is that she loved swimming in the pool. She actually cried when we took her out of the water. She also received gifts from the people who blessed her on her birthday. 

4. Her birthday was on Christmas Eve. 

I was anxious that no one would attend her party because people might be too busy with their Christmas Eve preparations and wouldn't have time or would be too rushed if they came to our party.

5.  Event planning is quite stressful and a big party is costly. 

I am sure I will obsess over planning Bela's party until my stress level is up to the roof. To let it be handled by an event planner is not my style, I like being hands-on. I said I'd rather use the money for something we can enjoy as a family such as a hotel staycation and fancy dining experience. The amount that I saved from throwing a party went to Bela's savings which I know now is wiser.

I am not saying don't celebrate or throw a big party for your kids. I am not writing this to discourage anyone, just sharing my personal take on these things happening in my life right now. You do what you think is best for you and be confident about it. 

For me, this was the right thing and I know Bela would understand when she gets older. I also explained this to my other kids and they know.